Cheers to 2015

I sat down yesterday and wrote an entire blog post on saying goodbye to 2015. Then, when I couldn't sleep last night, I decided to delete it and start over. I rewrote the whole thing in my mind.

That's my way of writing. When the words come, I write furiously then let them sit. I reread them. It's funny because there are times when I instantly know that I hate what I have written and then I delete all of it and start over without giving it a second thought.

Other times, I can take the foundation and morph the words into a piece that I love. This is the process that I've used my whole life. Even in middle school and high school (before computers and even typewriters), I would hand write entire papers and then mark them up and rewrite them or just throw them away and start over.

That brings us back to this blog post. I wrote this long post full of things from 2015. I knew the minute I saved it that it wasn't what I wanted to say. I decided to let it simmer and reread it today.

My writing mirrors my life in so many ways. I create content by making life choices. Once a choice is made, I give it time before I evaluate it. Some times, I can take the choice and its' foundation, make adjustments and produce amazing results. There are other times that I realize that I just need to let go and start over.

Life is a continual cycle of making choices, evaluating them, letting go, making adjustments, learning, and moving forward.

After I wrote the first post, I found this great quote on Facebook:

"Do not move on to 2016 without letting go of something significant from 2015, an old idea, habit, fear, concern of ego. Let go to free up the whitespace for something new to enter." - Brendon Burchard

How appropriate.

2015 was a fine year. It certainly had some amazing moments but like any other year, it had challenges. As I get older, I try to learn from the choices I make so that I continue to pick the best option next time. As a wife and mother, the option I choose doesn't just affect me but in many cases, it has the ability to change our whole family cycle.

If I add another commitment to my plate, will it take time away from Altman and the children or will it allow me to spend more time with the boys?

For example, I chose to be Room Mom this year for Jackson's class. I was hesitant about saying yes. But, I found that it allows me to help the teacher and to see my son regularly during school hours. I get to watch him learn and grow as a person. Good choice. I'll be more than happy to choose this option in the future.

What will you let go from 2015?

I've started my list. And I plan to remind myself of it every day. I have a lot to leave behind in 2015. What I leave behind has helped me grow to the person I am but it's time to look ahead to a new year, a new chapter, and the fun that lies ahead.

Happy New Year friends!

We Have Children!

I am no expert on raising children. When Jackson was born, we tried to keep our expectations simple because everything was so new to us. Our main goal was simple. Keep the kid alive. Each day that he was alive at bedtime and when it was time to wake up was a success. So far, we're 100% on that goal. When Karson was born, our mantra became "survive and advance" and we still stick to that one.

We are heading toward a transition time. We moved on a long time ago from the infant phase and then the baby phase. We hit the toddler phase like a freight train. I don't remember terrible two's with Jackson but Karson has been more than willing to expose us to this phase. I am ready to move on to the tranquil three's. Or the fun four's. Those exist. Right?

Karson is becoming a person. A real boy. One that "do it myself" and has "my turn" and doesn't want help from mommy or daddy. One that wraps his arms around my neck and gives me big kisses. One who tackles Jason down in the family room floor. One that would follow his brother to the ends of the Earth. He knows how to make us laugh and he understands when he's in trouble. He is taking life head on. Literally.

We now have children. We've always had children but specifically, we had infants, babies, toddlers, and even preschooler.

Now, we have a kindergartner and a toddler that is finding his personality.

That toddler is soon to be a preschooler and then a kindergartner. Our kindergartner has already completed the first half of his first year of school. Soon we'll see first grade and I am guessing that I will wake up soon and be preparing for graduation. There'll be lots of homework, activities, laughs, tears, and more in the years to come.

I read an article earlier about how there's a fine line of happy and grief as your children get older. We are still in a wonderful place where the boys want to snuggle and be held. They want to hold my hand but I am painfully aware that each time Jackson holds my hand could be the last time. There may be a time when he's too cool for that and I'll live but I will miss it terribly.

There'll be a time when my itty-bitty Karson is tackling down other players in sports instead of running around our family room like a mad man.

We spent the night away last night and I am guessing that's why I am so sentimental today. Jason and I needed to go out, have fun, and sleep. And we did. And then as soon as breakfast was finished, I was ready to come home to the boys.

My boys.